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Tuesday, October 12, 2010
Bristol Palin on 'Dancing with the Stars' pokes fun at mother, Sarah Palin
Posted by beat loard at 7:38 AM
Despite her bedazzled booty shorts, the "Umbrella"-laced routine was about as gloomy as the rainy day accessory being sung about. Bristol brings no fire to her performances, there is no intensity in her eyes and finally the judges put her on blast for it by sticking her with the night's second lowest set of scores. 
Coming in last was once again The Situation (who Bristol has been battling with all season for worst dancer honors) -- his Argentine Tango was sloppier than any boozy behavior captured by the "Jersey Shore" cameras. I love that by this point, Karina Smirnoff knows she can't rely on him so all her routines involve dancing around him. The "Dancing with the Stars" stage has become a 360-degree shakespearean pit and you know what that means, guys! It's acoustic week! Apparently that means no one can land their moves anymore and ABC is all up in arms because they are now scoring for technique AND performance - a double score showdown! Ooooh! Please.
Oh, finally, The Situation has his abs out. He's fist pumping -- he's such a cheese. Guess he thought he'd resort to the old charm to maintain his precarious standing. Apparently Bristol is getting all sexy this week too, which looks like it involves some stripping as she's wearing a bulky white button down shirt with sparkly black thingy beneath.Kurt Warner is dancing the rumba to celebrate his 13th wedding anniversary. He and Anna are trying to infuse the dance with sexiness but he won't put his hands on her hips because he's a "Christian guy." Dude, she's not asking you to make out with her in the closet. Plus, without make-up, Anna looks rough, so it's not like he can't help himself.
The duo's significant others show up to make sure they don't trip and start making babies together. Kurt's wife looks a bit displeased, then reveals it's because it reminds her of when they first dated and Kurt kept looking for someone better. Ouch!During the dance, Kurt still looks stiff but he's got some good hip action going on. Len thought his posture was over the top but that the romantic side was well done. Bruno had trouble with his movement and the lack of chemistry. But Carrie Ann loved it. "Chemistry isn't all about raunch, Bruno," she said.
Technical: All 5's
Performance: Carrie 7, Len 6, Bruno 6
Brandy doesn't feel sexy because she hasn't been with someone in six years. Say what? Maks takes her to a bar to be romantic -- flowers, wine, chocolates included -- but nit picker that she is, Brandy says he needs to be more convincing. Um, six years is looking pretty good for her right now.
Already in the opening this dance feels wrong. Brandy is lying on the floor like a dead fish and Maksim is circling around her like a hungry shark. But that dinner seems to have done the trick (did these two have a night cap?) - Brandy is super into it, though it's a little distracting to see her wear a very flappy silk sheathe with nothing but a pair of sparkly briefs and bra underneath.
Suddenly Brandy rips off Maks' shirt and throws herself on the ground before my recording dies a horrible death, but it looks like she resumes her dead fish pose. Carrie said she'd been waiting for the real Brandy and called it her comeback night. Len thought it was a little hot and spicy for his teaste.
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